Insane Clown Posse

I had a nightmare last night that scared the bejesus out of me.

I was at home and was getting ready for bed when I heard footsteps on my porch. I peeked out the bathroom window (2nd floor) and saw three young men I didn't recognize, roughly 17, 18 yrs hanging out on my porch. The street I live on is a dead end and it's almost like the whole street is a community 'front yard'. It's really cool that way. So while I thought 'who the hell are those kids and why are they on my porch', I also thought okay, maybe they don't realize this is my house, not the kid's they're hanging out with. My kid was in bed asleep in the dream.

And I almost forgot to mention, these kids all had their faces painted circus clown style, red, blue, white, but sloppy, like Halloween make up.

So I peek out underneath the blind again and I see them there (although this is actually physically impossible with my actual house, but let's suspend reality) and I look around the street and realize all the other kids have gone in, but these boys are still there. Then I hear one of them try my door, which is thankfully locked. My first reaction is to yell at them to get the hell off my porch but for once in my life I'm thinking it might be safer to shut the hell up and they'll go away. And they're not really doing anything other than hanging out on my porch. And I notice my dog isn't barking and I find this odd. He doesn't bark at familiar people or sounds.

I continue getting ready for bed and just before I slip under the sheets I look again and see then heading off down the street. I think I see a beer in one of their hands but my subconscious could have inserted this apres-dream for effect.

So I crawl into bed relieved they're wandering away. But not minutes later I hear my doorknob (downstairs) rattle again and I hear them again and I know they're trying to get into my house. I think they think my house is empty and they want to just come in and hang out and drink beer but what will they do when they get in and realize there are people in here, and one lonely female with a child at that.

Feeling the panic rise I reach for the cordless phone by my bed but find it's gone dead because my daughter left it off the base too long. Trying to be quiet I curse and sneak into the hallway to get a different cordless. Sidenote: I don't know why I'm being quiet and sneaking beause they actually haven't gotten into the house at this point. In the dream I feel like if they hear me they'll bust into the house to get me. And I don't have a cordless phone on a table in the hallway.

I try to muffle the sound of pressing the buttons for 911 by hiding in a corner of the room and covering it with a blanket. I also don't want to wake my daughter up because she'd panic more than me. I can hear them moving around outside my house, looking for a way in. The line rings and an automated voice tells me I've reached 911 and they're going to pass me to an operator... and it rings... and the doorknob rattles a little harder, they laugh... it rings... are they at the back of the house... it continues to ring and no one is picking up and I'm thinking if they don't hurry up it'll be too late... and it's still ringing and I'm panicing and my breathing is rapid and shallow and I'm suddenly terrified...

And I wake up with a start, breathing rapid and shallow, my eyes wide, looking around. It only takes a few seconds to realize it was just a dream and I slowly calm down, put my head back on the pillow and wonder if I should go shut the bathroom window.

And I don't want to leave my front dooe unlocked at all anymore.